Ways to be Okay

It’s easy to reduce issues like depression, anxiety, and loneliness to the pandemic, but to do so, gives the pandemic a bit more influence than it deserves. Sure, the pandemic intensified those problems due to the isolating nature of it. The pandemic also brought losses, whether it was the loss of jobs, friends, family members, or a combination of these losses. It was a time of fear and uncertainty.

However, it would be wrong to give the pandemic all the responsibility. Before the pandemic, Americans were experiencing high rates of anxiety and depression, with estimates showing more than one in five individuals suffering. Addiction to substances like alcohol and opiates was already rampant. Loneliness and isolation were a part of life for many, even before the lockdowns.

Where do we go now?

With many people returning to life the way it was before, where do we go now? How do we make things better as we move forward, hopefully past the pandemic? The answers might be simpler than they seem.

Accept the Present

Accepting the present sounds obvious, but many of us fall into the trap of either dwelling on the past or daydreaming about the future. Both activities are natural, but the present is where your focus should be.

The past is finished, and the future isn’t here or determined yet. The present is the material you have at your disposal. As an artist, the present is your paint and canvas to create the life you want.

Be present for your life. Put down your phone. If you are working on a task, focus on it fully. Schedule time for yourself to focus on something that will enhance your life or your happiness and keep that time for that specific purpose. Use it when it is scheduled without allowing for distractions.

Be Kind to Yourself and Others

Change takes time. Learning something takes time and effort. Give yourself a break when you have difficulties and give yourself props when you accomplish something, even if it is as small as doing all the dishes. Small steps in the right direction can land you where you want to be.

People can silently suffer. Sometimes we learn about it too late. It’s important to be kind. You never know how badly someone might need it. Even people who appear to have perfect lives might be going through terrible hardships. Kindness is not accompanied by regret, but carelessness or callousness often is.

If you are kind to others, you will also find that eventually, that kindness comes back around. Being kind and honest about who you are is the best way to ensure sincere, respectful, and reciprocal relationships with others.

Being kind doesn’t mean allowing others to take advantage of you. Sometimes being kind involves honesty and doing what is best for yourself, and that’s okay too.

Find a Community

Speaking of people and relationships, community is important. Indeed, this is an aspect of modern life that may not be aligned with human happiness. We are social creatures, and humans once lived in tight-knit communities. Time was spent around campfires storytelling and learning. We once knew one another and where we all fit in our community.

As more people look online for social interaction, the sense of community is replaced by something less satisfying. All communities are not created equal, and online, people may not be who we think they are.

Loneliness is closely related to anxiety and depression. The answer to loneliness is not waiting online. The answer is in healthy relationships with strong bonds and open communication. Your community may be family or friends. Perhaps you feel you don’t have the community you want. If that is the case, it may be time to extend your search.

Think about the types of people you want in your community. Consider your hobbies, beliefs, and interests. You may find your community by finding people with whom you have these things in common. Joining a club, playing a sport, volunteering, or joining nature-related activities are just a few ideas for pinpointing communities of people who may have similar interests to yours.

We don’t sit around campfires very often anymore. We sit indoors in controlled environments. However, it does a body and mind good to get outside if you can. Even if you don’t have a campfire, find your community and tell stories. Try to get back to what it means to be human, the moments that matter, the moments that aren’t found on a device because life isn’t happening on a flat screen. Life is happening right now, here in the present, and this is your time to shine by being kind to others and yourself.

These are just a few ideas, but we know sometimes taking these first steps is hard. Not all loneliness, anxiety, or depression is so easily banished. If you are feeling overwhelmed by negative feelings you can’t shake, consider reaching out to one of our counselors for help. An experienced therapist can help you understand and work on processing and moving past those feelings.

If you are experiencing these feelings and need to speak to someone right away, please contact the Mental Health Hotline for 24/7 assistance.